Jealousy is truly such a yucky and horrible emotion to experience, but unfortunately, it is one that kids, adults, and teens all experience. Jealousy can stem from not having as many possessions as someone, perhaps an American Girl Doll that a friend has (most likely during your elementary school stages). As a teen, jealousy over how other people look or how many friends they have, maybe. As an adult (a stage I have not yet experienced) possibly jealousy over career positions or how “happy” an adult seems in their life. I feel like jealousy mainly stems from comparison or feeling like you are less/have less than another person. As a teen girl in a social-media obsessed world (which is essentially a highlight reel), jealousy can be painful and sudden even though I do not have social media. A person gets a great grade on a test I felt like I didn’t do well on, or a pretty girl walks by on a day I’m feeling insecure. Or I didn’t get invited to a social event that some of my friends went to. Comparing yourself to your friends or to strangers or classmates can really only lead to putting yourself down, or putting them down to make you feel better. For example, someone passes you in the hall and you call them ugly in your head. Whenever I do that, I try to catch myself and ask myself if I would want someone to think about me like that in their head. I always feel ashamed whenever I put people down in my own head but I do feel like everyone does it at times. The best thing to do is to try to view everyone in a positive light even if it’s hard sometimes. Comparison can truly lead to nothing but bad feelings. No one has everything, and everyone, regardless of how happy they may seem or pretty you think they are, struggles with things every day. It’s also unfair to judge people based on how they appear on the surface.
Ways to Avoid Comparison/Stop Yourself in the Act:
- Look at people positively/point out the positive things in people
- Realize that everyone has flaws
- Avoid your “triggers”
- Activities that may trigger jealousy
- Ex: walking through a mall, driving through an expensive neighborhood
- Activities that may trigger jealousy
- Your “insides” can’t be compared to other people’s “outsides”
- Use comparison as motivation to improve what does matter
- Write down things that you are grateful for
SOURCE:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/prescriptions-life/201803/how-stop-comparing-yourself-others
Out of My Mind 